Pairing: John Sheppard/Rodney McKay
Warnings/Content notes: (skip) None that I'm aware of
Spoilers: various things from all five seasons and SG-1
Word count: 279
Summary: Rodney has a mental list of things he would have done differently. It's a very, very long list.
Rodney has a mental list of things he would have done differently. It's a very, very long list. Whoever said to live your life without regrets was either a masochist or too stupid to learn from their mistakes.
It starts with his childhood and not taking to heart what his parents said to each other in the heat of one of their arguments. There's giving up music, Kenny Smith's party, the seafood restaurant, and ever wasting a second of his life on Elaine Stephenson.
Later there's doomed attempts to blend in, taking Psychology 101 just to meet girls, various research that a trained monkey could have done, and not joining the Stargate program sooner.
He regrets the way the thing with Teal'c went down (even though he stands by much that he said), the Brotherhood, the Genii, Doranda, re-activating the Asurans, Grodin, Ford, Carson, Elizabeth and everyone else who died under his watch.
He wishes he could have seen sooner that Katie wasn't the right person for him and that he wasn't the right person for Jennifer. He wishes he had reconnected with his sister sooner.
When John tells—in a way that's not so much telling as avoiding Rodney's gaze and shuffling his feet—him he likes him and Rodney realizes he likes John as well, Rodney regrets all the years that they've wasted.
But lately, when John snuggles up to him with his sexy, hairy body and cold feet and what they have feels suspiciously like a relationship and happiness, Rodney wonders about his list of regrets.
If what he has now is the result of all that's come before ... he doesn't want to change a thing.